By Ernst: It is a feeling of emptiness, sadness and sometimes fear. Do you recognize the feeling that no one understands you and that you have been abandoned by everyone? Even if you were the center of attention in a group of happy partying people, you would still feel alone and lost, wondering, “What the hell am I doing here?”
The feeling that you can’t connect with the people around or even with your family, people you love, you just don’t feel connected to the world. This feeling has nothing to do with the people around you. Even in a relationship, you can be very lonely and the outside world does not see this. Having or not having a relationship has nothing to do with the feeling of loneliness. It seems as if something separates you from the rest of the world and that feeling is inside you, it is a personal experience.
Loneliness hurts. You are the only one who can help yourself and acknowledging that you feel lonely is very important. The influence of loneliness can be immense, lead to health problems, a poor sense of well-being and not being happy. Loneliness occurs among all age groups and in all layers of society. Especially nowadays, when more and more people find themselves alone in society, loneliness is becoming an increasing problem.
Someone who only has a few contacts does not necessarily have to be lonely. While someone who has many people around him can still feel lonely. You only feel lonely if you experience the lack of relationships or contacts as a bad thing. It’s something you can only feel yourself. It’s about how you perceive the situation. It is difficult for others to see if you feel lonely. They don’t see how much you want a meaningful relationship with a partner, family or friends. This makes loneliness so difficult for others to assess.
How do you deal with loneliness?
Often people are ashamed of feeling lonely and no one likes to talk about it or admit that he or she is lonely, while everyone can feel lonely at times in his or her life. It is important to get started to break through this loneliness. If you can’t think of a reason yourself how and why you could break through this loneliness and you don’t commit, you won’t succeed in doing this either. You can combat loneliness by motivating and helping yourself, or by seeking help from a counselor or life coach. It is important that the cause of your loneliness is found, so that you can process it and find the strength within yourself again.
What you can do yourself to break through the cycle of loneliness:
• Look for associations in your area with people who share the same interests as you and see if you would like to join them.
• Dare to ask for help in your area. People often like to do something for someone else.
��� Offer your help to people in your area through volunteering.
• Connect with people nearby, such as chatting while shopping at the convenience store.
• If you have children, try talking to the parents of friends.
• If you have a dog, you can chat with other dog owners while walking.
• Many people also benefit from coming into contact with fellow sufferers, for example in a patient association. People find understanding there and experience that there are more people who do understand exactly what you feel.
• In many municipalities, social services or voluntary organizations, they organize activities for people who are lonely. You can contact them.
• You can also look for information on the internet on how to better deal with your loneliness. You can do this by means of a course (online), or by looking for tips or further information about loneliness. You can contact an (online) telephone hotline, or a chat. Here you can just vent your heart and find a listening ear with perhaps some insights on how to handle things, so that you get some tools to tackle loneliness.
Everyone needs contact with another person from time to time to exchange ideas or to find a listening ear, to vent your heart or to gain insight into a problem.
This can be about all facets of life, such as sadness, loss, worries or loneliness, but also about matters that are difficult to discuss with the immediate environment. Sometimes it’s just about having some contact with another human being.
Love and Light,
Ernst
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